How NOT to Burn Your House Down

As a culinary neophyte, you occasionally get something in the great wide world of cooking wrong. And sometimes getting it wrong means that the oven accidentally catches on fire and you set the fire alarm off for the entire apartment building. Sometimes. Especially when there are flaming drawers of death involved. (Note: flaming drawers of death can also be called broilers.)

So for those of you that don’t know, a broiler is a lovely way to cook things like steak, since they apply direct, intense heat to whatever you’re cooking (by way of an open flame). In some ovens, using the broiler just means you turn on the broiler setting and put whatever you’re cooking in the big, main part of the oven. In other ovens, the broiler is in what looks like a drawer underneath the main part. (I was under the impression that the “drawer” was for storing pots and pans and such. Right for a normal oven. WRONG for the second type of oven.)

As for not burning your house down:

When broiling things like juicy steaks, you have to make sure NOT to have the drawer on the top ledge, or the grease/fat from the meat will catch fire, and flames will start flicking out the side of your oven, possibly blackening the sides of your cabinets, and potentially burning your house down. I assure you the whole situation is stressful and should be avoided. Easiest ways to avoid broiler fires: a) get the normal type of oven instead of the flaming-drawer-of-death type b) don’t broil things. Not that hard, there are other ways to cook things- grilling, frying, etc. c) learn which ledge to put the drawer on. Top ledge is for veggies (less grease to catch on fire), middle ledge for fish, and bottom possible ledge for meat (although honestly, I really suggest that you just cut down the risk and don’t broil things at all).

Ed. Note: Another solution is to be a vegetarian, in which case you would not be trying to broil steaks.